Turning struggles into strengths: A psychological guide to growth

Turning struggles into strengths: A psychological guide to growth

By Haika Gerson

As we navigate adulthood, struggles become inevitable. This phase can feel particularly intense, marked by financial worries, career uncertainty, and shifting relationships.

However, while struggles can feel like heavy burdens, they also hold the potential to become transformative experiences.
The question is: How do we turn our challenges into stepping stones for growth?

Why struggles matter
Struggles often serve as mirrors, reflecting our strengths and areas for improvement. Ignoring or avoiding them only delays the growth they can inspire.

As renowned psychologist Abraham Maslow pointed out in his Hierarchy of Needs, challenges often arise when we’re striving to meet our needs—whether they are related to survival, relationships, or self-fulfilment.

For example, someone facing financial struggles might be forced to rethink their spending habits, creating a foundation for long-term financial stability.
These difficulties, while uncomfortable, push us to develop resilience, creativity, and problem-solving skills.

Many young adults, face the challenge of balancing financial pressures—whether it’s paying school fees, supporting families, or managing small business finances.

These challenges often push young adults to learn budgeting skills, innovate their businesses, or seek financial literacy, which ultimately builds resilience.

Psychological theory: Cognitive appraisal
Understanding how we interpret struggles is key to overcoming them. Cognitive appraisal, introduced by psychologists Richard Lazarus and Susan Folkman, explains how our perception of an event determines our emotional response.

If we see a struggle as insurmountable, it will overwhelm us. But if we view it as a challenge we can navigate, it becomes an opportunity to grow.

To reframe your struggles:

  • Ask empowering questions: Instead of “Why is this happening to me?” try “What can I learn from this?”
  • Focus on what you can control: Redirect energy toward actionable steps rather than dwelling on things outside your influence.

Recognising growth hidden in struggles
While we often associate growth with visible milestones—like promotions or academic achievements—some of the most profound transformations happen internally.
Struggles teach us patience, humility, and adaptability, skills that aren’t always tangible but are invaluable in the long run.

Cognitive appraisal suggests that how we perceive our struggles can change their impact.
When we view challenges as opportunities to grow, we develop emotional resilience.
For instance, someone navigating the end of a long-term relationship might learn to set healthier boundaries or recognise the importance of self-love.

These lessons often carry more weight than any external achievement.
Struggles teach us patience, humility, and adaptability, skills that aren’t always tangible but are invaluable in the long run.

For example, a young person from a rural area might struggle to afford university tuition, but this challenge may ignite their entrepreneurial spirit, leading them to create a start-up or pursue a vocational skill that aligns with their passions.

Building emotional resilience
Resilience isn’t about avoiding hardship but about learning to bounce back.
According to the stress inoculation theory by psychologist Donald Meichenbaum, exposure to manageable stress can make us stronger over time.
This means that struggles, when approached correctly, can serve as “training grounds” for resilience.

To build resilience:

  • Cultivate emotional awareness: Journaling or talking with someone you trust can help you process feelings rather than suppress them.
  • Develop problem-solving skills: Break challenges into smaller, manageable parts to avoid feeling overwhelmed.
  • Practice self-care: Prioritise sleep, nutrition, and physical activity to maintain emotional balance during tough times.

Struggles and identity formation
In Erik Erikson’s theory of psychosocial development, young adults face the challenge of identity versus role confusion. Struggles often emerge as we try to define who we are and what we stand for.

While these moments can feel disorienting, they’re essential for identity formation. For example, career setbacks might force you to question whether you’re on the right path.
Rather than seeing this as failure, consider it a chance to realign with your passions and values.
Struggles clarify what truly matters to us, shaping the individuals we become.

Practical strategies for transformation
Embrace flexibility:
Life rarely goes as planned.
Adopting a flexible mind-set allows you to adapt and find new opportunities in unexpected situations.

Learn from role models:
Seek inspiration from people who’ve turned their struggles into strengths, whether through biographies, podcasts, or local mentors.

Find purpose in your pain: Viktor Frankl, a Holocaust survivor and psychiatrist, argued that finding meaning in suffering can make even the most difficult experiences bearable.
Ask yourself: “How can this struggle contribute to my growth?”

Connect with community:
Shared struggles often create the strongest bonds.
Joining a support group or engaging in your community can remind you that you’re not alone.

Balancing struggle and self-compassion
While struggles are opportunities for growth, it’s important to approach them with self-compassion.
Research by psychologist Kristin Neff highlights the importance of treating ourselves with kindness during difficult times.
Be patient with yourself, and remember that growth is a process, not an overnight transformation.

Simple ways to practice self-compassion include:

  • Speaking to yourself as you would to a friend.
  • Celebrating small wins.
  • Allowing yourself to rest without guilt.

Redefining success
One of the biggest lessons struggles teach us is that success isn’t a straight line. True success often involves detours, failures, and moments of doubt.

By redefining success as the ability to grow and learn from challenges, you free yourself from the unrealistic expectation of perfection.

Struggles are an inevitable part of life, especially in early adulthood. But rather than viewing them as obstacles, consider them opportunities to build resilience, develop self-awareness, and discover your true potential.

The journey of turning struggles into strengths isn’t easy, but it’s deeply rewarding.
Embrace the process, seek support when needed, and trust that every challenge brings you closer to becoming the best version of yourself.

Haika Gerson is a writer and psychology student at the University of Derby, passionate about human behaviour and mental well-being.

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